Why should memoirists, memory collectors, and family historians write about hopes and dreams?

I get it. We’ve long let go of the hopes and dreams we had as youngsters. Sometimes the idea of revisiting them seems like a frolic with immaturity. So why should we include such inanities in a legacy of memories?

First, there’s nothing wrong with frolicking.

Furthermore, the aspirations we had and entertained are part of our stories. We should write about hopes and dreams because the manner in which we sustained them (or not) also reveal our inner workings.

Some hopes or dreams might only be worth a quick mention, such as when my niece confided that she couldn’t decide if she wanted to be a hairdresser or a dolphin trainer. I was curious as to how she had narrowed it down to those two options, but she offered no insight. “Just what I want to be…”

It’s a fun story to remember. There doesn’t have to be more to it than that.

Write about Hopes and Dreams (or Obsessions) of Childhood

When my son was three, he wanted nothing more than to be a fire fighter. At four, he’d switched to dreaming of becoming an astronaut. In college he decided on engineering.

Still, those childhood obsessions with land and space vehicles, science, and exploration were early indications. So were some of his early “experiments,” but that’s another (funny) post.  But he’s never quite let go of the appreciation of astronomy. Looking at the night sky with a slight emotional longing will also be a part of him.

As you start writing about hope and dreams, start with your early days. What did you dream of being or doing as a child? Is that dream at all related to your current vocation or avocation?

It can also be fun to set those hopes and dreams against social and technological context. If you were a child of the 1940s, perhaps dreaming of being an astronaut wasn’t on the table. Likewise, the career choices for women in the 60s and 70s were also limited.  Your dreams might indicate how much of a trail blazer you thought you’d be.

Achieving or letting go of hopes and dreams

When I was an over-achieving college student, I dreamed of CHANGING the WORLD.  Yes, in all caps.  It wasn’t going to be subtle.

I thought having a productive career and healthy family would be mundane. Part of my story is how I came to value health and happiness over travel, adventure, and achievement.  If I’m honest, for me to write about hopes and dreams involves confronting the question of were they things I wanted to be or were they more about how I wanted people to think about me.

Others have preserved and achieved their hopes and dreams. Their stories are about their drive to succeed, what sustained that drive, and at what cost they managed to see their hopes to fruition.

Many—if not most—young athletes dream of getting college scholarships and becoming highly paid professionals. Very few actually pursue that dream. Along the way, they find their play isn’t quite up to that level or decide that they’d rather have a well-rounded life. Sometimes that decision is a slow realization; other times it comes during a moment of heartbreak. Either way, it’s a milestone worth writing about.

What’s your story? Are you still on the path of achieving the hopes and dreams of a younger self, or have you developed all new dreams? What caused you to re-assess?

Small Hopes and Dreams & Heart’s Desire

Hopes and Dreams illuminated?

Did you ever dream of a specific new toy, piece of sports equipment, or a particular trading card? What about a pet? Did you ever get it? How excited were you? There’s a story in there somewhere!

At about five or six years old, another niece, sister of the above-mentioned niece, wanted nothing more for Christmas than a flashlight. That was her only request to Santa, parents, grandparents, and aunts and uncles. So, Santa brought her the flashlight and the rest of us had to punt.

She was so thrilled at Santa’s fulfillment of her fondest wish, that she had no interest in opening any other presents. To this day, it makes us wonder. How did she get so fixated on that flashlight? What did her single wish teach the rest of us about our Christmas materialism?

Current Hopes and Dreams

Hopes and dreams are not just the stuff of the past. What do you hope? What are your dreams? Are you as invested in your dreams for yourself as you are in your dreams for your spouse or children? Have you put aside your dreams to help someone else achieve theirs? Write about it.

Write about Hopes and Dreams of Others

Don’t forget that these questions can also be directed at other family members as you interview them and collect their stories. As you converse, collect context information. What did the family think of their dreams? How did their hopes reflect societal values. There may be some great stories in there.

Your Turn

Do you have an idea for writing about hopes and dreams? Please comment below. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

© Laura Hedgecock 2013, Revised 2021.